Mick walks into Paddy’s barn and catches him doing a sexy striptease to a large piece of red machinery.
Mick says "What the hell are you doing Paddy?"
Paddy replies "Well me and Mary haven’t been getting on lately and the therapist recommended that I do something sexy to a tractor."
On our way to Perth we dropped Toby off at the kennels (where he was born).
Both Toby’s mum and dad live there and there was also another younger dog that looked exactly like Toby.
Kris commented "That dog looks just like Toby"
The owner replied "Yes, that’s Toby’s half-brother".
A guy is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm.
His friend stops him and asks, "Hey! Whatcha got that case of beer for?"
"Well, I got it for my wife, you see?" the guys answers.
"Wow," exclaims his friend, "Great trade.
Movie Quotes – The First Drafts
The Godfather
"I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse. Well, he can refuse it, of course. I just know that if someone were to make me an offer like this, I’d jump all over it. But who am I to impose my feelings on someone else?"
The Terminator
"I’ll be back. Do you need anything while I’m out?"
Joke of the Year
Two women were sitting quietly together, minding their own business.
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?"
