The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A little girl walks into her parents’ bathroom and notices for the First time, her father’s nakedness.

Immediately, she is curious: he has equipment that she doesn’t have. She asks, "What are those round things hanging there, daddy?"

Proudly, he replies, "Those, sweetheart, are God’s Apples of Life. Without them we wouldn’t be here."

Puzzled, she seeks out her mummy and tells her what daddy has said.

To which mummy asks, "Did he say anything about the dead branch they’re hanging from?"

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A suburban mother’s role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.

Little Donna was in the back yard filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence.

Interested in what the rosy-faced youngster was doing, he asked, "What are you doing there, Donna?"

"My goldfish died," replied little Donna tearfully without looking up, "and I’ve just buried him."

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A frog walks into his local bank branch, asks for the loans officer. He goes in, sits on her desk, and sees shes called Patricia Whack. He asks her for a $50,000 loan to do a world cruise. She asks what security he has and he produces a 4 cm pink porcelain elephant and says his dad is Mick Jagger. She asks the manager for advice – he says

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

A middle-aged man asked the Trainer in the gym:
"IF I wanted to impress that beautiful girl, which machine should I use?"
The Trainer smiling replies:
" The ATM machine outside the gym…"

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day.
Teach him to use the Net and he won’t bother you for weeks."

The Fabulous Friday Funnies

I was driving around and around a packed parking garage in search of an available space. Nothing. Then I noticed a couple walking ahead of me.

"Going out?" I called to them hopefully.

"No," said the man. "Just friends."