Paddy was waiting at the bus stop with his mate when a truck went by loaded up with rolls of turf. Paddy said, ‘I’m gonna do that when I win lottery’ ‘What’s dat’, says his mate.
‘Send me lawn away to be cut’
"Anybody who believes that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach flunked geography." -Robert Byrne
"According to the National Institute of Health, as people age, their brains respond less strongly to rewards. They say older people become less excited when they win some- thing. Whoever did this study has never seen a bingo game." -Jay Leno
I believe my little daughter wants a pair of glasses. I don’t know why she does. Perhaps glasses are now "cool" to have in school? But though she sees just fine, she still says she needs glasses.
On our way to Perth we dropped Toby off at the kennels (where he was born).
Both Toby’s mum and dad live there and there was also another younger dog that looked exactly like Toby.
Kris commented "That dog looks just like Toby"
The owner replied "Yes, that’s Toby’s half-brother".
Every night, Harry goes out drinking. And every night, his wife, Louise, yells at him. One day, one of Louise’s friends suggests that she try a different tack. "Welcome him home with a kiss and some loving words," she says. "He might change his ways."
That night, Harry stumbles back home as usual. But instead of berating him, Louise helps him into an easy chair, puts his feet up on the ottoman, removes his shoes, and gently massages his neck.
"It’s late," she whispers. "I think we should go upstairs to bed now, don’t you?"
Welcome to the personal website of Adrian Hodge. I'm a web designer/developer living in Rotorua, New Zealand. Married with two lovely kids, I have a love of motorcycles and gadgets. During the day I'm an Application Developer for Rotorua District Council and after hours I run Hodgeman Web & Design.
